Even Ginger people

Just seen this, thought it was maybe a little offensive but still really funny!

Not much news really - Christmas is coming so I'm working like a dog at the moment. I don't mind too much as it can be good fun if not a little stressful trying to explain why a 12 year old wants a particular phone.

I managed to win a laptop last week in work, I'm not sure how and I don't really want to ask as surely to win a laptop you should be focusing on it.

My days off at this time of year and since the last trip to Glendalough I have not managed to climb on real rock. I seem to be getting days off either side of nice or at least dry days. This means that I am in the coop a lot at the moment. There are a good few people down there in the evenings so I am enjoying the social scene. I think this must be almost what it's like to have real friends and not just stand next to groups of people in pubs pretending.

After talking to a few people of late I have decided that maybe some sort of climbing goals are necessary for me to really improve. I was hoping to be a little more " I'd just like to climb harder" but I think having a specific aim is key. I was trying to avoid this as climbing is supposed to be fun and I thought it would add unnecessary pressure. Most people seem to think without goals you lose focus, so I hope to have some short term goals up for the Beginning of next year.

Looking forward to the trip to Sheffield in January, I'd really like to be bouldering well for that as last time we went I had a stinking cold. Although the way the weather has been it will probably piss it down. It's all good as I still haven't been to the fabled Climbing Works.

Then in another honeymoon twist we could be heading to Fontainbleau for 9 days of the trip as well as skiing in Austria. The reason for this is we have both been busy and Ann just wouldn't enjoy a week sport climbing as she hasn't climbed much recently. In font she is quiet happy to sit read and relax, for me it's win win. She did ask what we could do in font when we are not climbing and I was stumped, go to font and not climb and drink, is there anything else? I also have to stop referring to the honeymoon as THE FONT TRIP!

So there we go the wedding invites are sent, I worked very hard overseeing their design and production. In seven weeks I get to go skiing for a week, then climbing for 10 days and Sheffield before that. Hmm there was some thing else, if it comes to me Ill post it.

If I don't catch you before the festive season have a good one.

I should be so lucky

No real news of any note, I left work today to find some tosser had swiped my bike. I was pretty pissed for a while as it's only just had a new tyre, anyhow at least I can get a new one now. It just means ill be using Ann's bike for a while, also will be getting some water proof trousers I have been soaked more times than I care to remember.

The parents were over for a few days which was nice, we ate out loads, had a nice meal in Saba. They had 3 course's for 25 squid, what a result! We thought it might be a little on the pricey side. strongly recommend it the place was packed as well, good considering it was a Tuesday. Just goes to show what a healthy price drop can do for business.

We also went to Glendalough I got within touching distance of the boulders before it rained, typical!

Haven't done any climbing since Monday was going to leave it another week as my wrist doesn't really seem to have healed much. I still don't have full range of movement so was going to do the sensible thing however I'm really bored after a week of no climbing or running.

So to the future Dec has kindly organised a trip in January to Sheffield, I want to be going well for that as it's full of wads over there. So from tomorrow I'm back in the game to the coop for some serious training hopefully the wrist will hold up.

On a side note I got progression on DVD, I know it's been well reviewed so I wont bother just to say I really enjoyed it and watch it if you get a chance.

Licensed to Wed

On my lunch break on Wednesday I tore into town to arrange are wedding license with Ann. Firstly I had to ring up and confirm were the appointment was as Ann had gone and booked it right when I was going to font! priority's as they are I managed to rebook, this is quiet a feet apparently as there is a waiting list and you have to do the thing 3 months before the wedding day.



Anyhow in my excitement I just wrote in Ann's Filofax wedding thing 2 o'clock, no place or with whom. It transpired it was on Lombard st, so I get the dart and meet Ann and off we troop. We go up to the 3rd floor of a very grotty building were this woman checks are id's and who's going to be a witness, date and time etc. Shes talking about this special day of getting the licence neither Ann nor i realised it was supposed to be special or we wouldn't have tried to do it on the lunch break. I don't think she really believed it was special or they would tart up the office a bit.



Business sorted she explains the licence telling us if we change a witness the priest needs to sign and initial, it turns out everything can be changed except the date as it has to be 3 months in advance. When we got out I warned Ann EVERYTHING can be changed except the date so she had better be on her best behaviour!!!!!!



Tim Chapman licence to wed!!!

There's a font update to follow just waiting for Ann to stop hogging the laptop.

Food

Yesterday as I was searching the fridge for the freshest lettuce I noticed one of them had a best before date of Wednesday! No actual date you just had to guess which Wednesday.

Then whilst flitting around Donnybrook fayre I was waiting at the meat counter reading the signs that said, "quality butchers" and "trained experts" when the lady in front asked "what is in the chicken Kiev"? The trained Butcher replied " you know chicken and stuff!!!"

This is an old post i just found and hadn't posted thought id stick it up anyhow.

Brilliant

Well maybe not to start with, I was saddened to hear about the death of mr Stephen Gateley. However I was impressed at how Bertie Ahern managed to plug his new book whilst paying a moving tribute to Stephen. Good bless that man, I might try and become an Irish citizen just to vote for him to become president! Here it is no RTE. Also look what i did learn hidden links, I'm such a blogging pro!!!

Glendalough

After a couple of sick days I decided to have a gentle stroll to the boulders. The weather was lovely, a light breeze and some sun, it did try and rain but we soldiered on and were rewarded with fine climbing. I was going for more mileage than pushing myself so I tried not to give any individual problem more than 2 goes. We started in the ruins, was well chuffed with doing the plum, one of my favourite problems and has a nasty habit of spitting me off. Then we sauntered up to the path side boulders and I managed to get the problem on the back off the egg boulder that Dermo did last time as well as the same warm up circuit. Did Chillax on the way up to the fin, I also tried the left hand version, I came pretty close but after 3 goes I didn't want to burn myself out so moved on. Got to the fin and had a play around there before settling on the fin ss. I tried it using the foot hold on the left that was pointed out to me at the end of last winter, it felt a lot more natural and I came very close on a number of occasions, I just have to hold the swing. This has me really looking forward to the winter I think it's the fittest I have come out of a summer ever, and with a drop in temperature who knows what might happen! Stopped off on big Jim on the way back and managed the dyno?!?! static which was nice .

In sickness and in health

So it appears I have man flu as Ann calls it. Whatever it is, it sucks I hate being off and being completely unable to do anything, My climbing Psyche is very high but I have only been able to get to the coop due to work issues while some have been to the fabled great outdoors. Now I haven't been able to do anything since Thursday. I have 2 weeks before I'm in the UK then its only 3 weeks after that and its font. I suppose its better to have the flu now than when I'm away. I once had the flu on a trip to Sheffield I couldn't really pull on anything and felt like crap for the whole trip. Yet it was still a fantastic trip but I really feel I let myself down. Here is a list of things to do to while your bored and off sick.

1, update your blog with a pointless list.

2, read all your climbing magazines.

3, watch Starwars ,return of the Jedi

4,watch back to the future

5, www.videoclimb.com they have 104 bouldering vid's hours just tick by.

I was lucky enough to sample some of Mr Tormey's home brew at the weekend, unlike the first batch if offered some of this I strongly recommend you accept as it was great!

I was thinking recently whether alcohol and drugs are blunting natural selection? 2 stupid unattractive people as a rule would generally not mate for one reason or another. However bring drink in to the mix and suddenly you have a drunken desperate adult who would normally know better who at 2:15 in the morning is desperately searching for validation, panicking and ends up going for anything! Now 9 months later there is a child and one of the parents who without liquor would never have had any chance of the dalliance has now passed stupidity an/or ugliness on to another generation. Without the liquor the person who should have known better would have taken an entirely different path.

2 Things,

1. http://www.breakingnews.ie/ireland/eycwgbeyidau/rss2/

A huge Python found in wexford??? No snakes in Ireland my eye. Cancel Paddys day next year, clearly a fraud. David Blaine take heed, you never know when you will be revealed as a hoax!!

2. I love the randomness of Ipod's shuffle. Yesterday I was getting my groove on down at the coop to Cypress Hill's 'cock the hammer' which was the latest in a long line of quality old school rap , metal and rock then from out of no ware Buddy Holly's 'that'll be the day'. I'd love to know the technology behind the 'randomness'.

the wisdom of kid's

So there I am flicking through my new glossy climber mag enjoying my holidays when Ann's niece, who if I'm honest I'm secretly trying to encourage to climb, comes over and sits with me. Bare in mind she is only 3 - she says "what you doing?" "reading my magazine", says I. "that's climbing"she says pointing at one of the very brightly coloured high res photos. Saweet, I think 'turned this one!'. As we move through the mag we now point at every photo, Pete Robins on a desperate e8, Ian Parnel on a long run out and Neil Grisham on some steep sport route that's climbing, that's climbing, that's climbing. Yes indeed that's climbing. Then we turn over and see the bouldering scene page...... there's a pause, you can imagine my excitement, she's going to point and say 'that's bouldering' she can tell the difference.... the pause continues, still nothing so I say "that's climbing"

Without hesitation she says 'no it's not'! In my head I flipped her off my lap and as she came crashing to the floor I scream 'it's the purest form of climbing'. However I just meekly reply "it is". Ah well live and learn.

No pain, no gain

Tried posting from the Iphone but it wouldn't let me put any words in the box, damn technology. This means this a brief post so your not just staring at a title. Last night me and my mate Dermo set off to Glendo on what literally turned out to be a fly or die mission! After solving the puzzle of 2 bikes and a pad in an Eco friendly (small) car, then rally driving and an excellent transition to bikes we arrived at the boulders at about 10 to 7. There was a slight breeze and we set to it. It went well to start nice warm up the traverse on the path side of the egg boulder was flashed, the ss to the rails was flashed. Now I'm not saying it was all pretty or a mighty dazzling display but for the first time back since march I didn't take my usual kicking. Then we tried the ss on the back off the egg, Dermo tried came down, I then had a go didn't get my heel right and couldn't swap to a press came off. Then from out of no ware and I'm sure playing dam busters They appeared. Dermo was just starting his second go so I bravely stayed to spot so he didn't damage his back but as soon as he was up that thing I dived for cover. Midges were every were, I tried to have another go but they were in my beard, ears every were. We packed up and for some reason thought maybe big Jim would be better. A quick recce showed it was marginally better, so I donned boots and no sooner had I done so they returned, da da da da daaa. da da da ,daa da, needless to say we split. Fun times but still worth the trip cant wait until it gets cooler roll on oct....

Elevator goooing up!

So for reasons far too boring to get into I find myself in the lifts of The Marine Hotel, Dun Laoghaire. The lady in the lift has already pressed the button to descend to the car park level. The lift politely notifies us in his calming voice that the lift is going down, or to be precise he says " Lift(long pause) going down"!

I proceed to go about my business in the car park, you know the usual checking for doggers etc..

When I have finished I go to get back in the lift, being the gentleman that I am I let the 2 foreign birds get in in front of me. Then the voice comes back on " lift...............(wait for it).....going up"!

So I turn to the 2 ladies and say " do you ever thing the voice goes AAARGHHHHH THE CABLES SNAPPED"!!

'No' they say 'but thanks we will now'.

Just a thought...

Short sharp shock

We now have Internet so all being well I'll try and post more often with much more amazing thoughts. Any news of note? Not really. I was down in Killkenny to show Ann's house and no one turned up which sucked! I have noticed that when ever I'm showing a house, at 10 to the first appointment I have bowel movements and you just can't desiccate in a bathroom your about to show! After one text and a no show the relief was akin to being told your teacher was off on a school test day.



From here it was off to the Foggs to witness the glory of their new indoor training facility, witness the fitness it will be. A 45 degree overhang in their back yard - those guys are gonna be so strong.



There has also been movement on the font front, this is now booked and in good time for a change. I have 12 weeks of training so will be hoping to have a good trip. I will not be trying Jetset this time as it just takes all my energy and ruins the trip. I'm going to just enjoy the forest and hopefully be fit enough to get up stuff.



The move is almost complete, we just have some finer sorting to do and to this end I ended up in the new Dublin Ikea today. It was like someone bored into my subconscious and developed my own personal hell then built it in Ballymun. It was packed with people all walking around picking up the same things that they dont really need and all the while Ikea say that it's good that it's all mass produced as it means they can sell it cheaper. I imagine all houses are going to start looking the same over the next few months. We didn't try the restaurant or the food area as I was nearly crying by this point, I will never be back there again!



OHHH I also got some new boots, the Red Chili drop zone. I'm not sure yet as I have been climbing in 5.10's for 10 years and I don't do change very well. The heel feels nice and snug and less likely to bend and twist but we shall see in time. The reason I got different new ones is I'm just far too lazy to go to Dundrum as it ranks on the same level as Ikea.



Hope you're all well

moving on

So we have a date, on Saturday we will be moving into the new gaff, very excited! Howth has been fun but it made me/us miss having our own place. Ann in her desperate need for coffee, offered to do all the moving in exchange for a cup the other morning, so happy days!! The new place is 15 minuets cycle from work and 10 minute walk to the dart station - all good news! Also close to Wicklow. We will be joining the glitterati (except Dermo) on the south side so I'm gonna have to be much posher innit...

So as we are all acutely aware the chances of Tim being posher are slim, so to this end I think I need to bring every one down to my level. You can't polish a turd as they say but you can make something nice look like a piece of shit. To start with I'm going on a mission to get words considered 'bad' down graded. This requires the constant use of them until they catch on and everyone starts using them. A prime example of this is 'gay' or 'dick' or 'wank'. These words are now regularly used in conversations by normal folk and no one bats an eyelid. O.K maybe not wank, but that shall be my starting point. I will try and use the word wank 3 times a day in general conversation, this will then spread like nits in a playground until everyone does it (insert evil chuckle). Those who know me best will be able to guess the ultimate end word and if I only succeed in saying it around my peers I will still consider it a small victory (like sleeping with a drunk woman) but a victory nonetheless.

I was recently at my sister's wedding which I enjoyed immensely although I believe I'll have to come out of my shell a little and maybe join in the dancing! I would like to know exactly what it is that makes me believe after a modicum of beer not that I can break dance but that everyone would like to see me not break dancing. Just rolling around the dance floor in a suit. Then the next day there are the usual feelings, I'm sure you all get them... No not embarrassment I would do it all again in a heartbeat, it's the bad back, the unexplained bruising and the pulled muscles. I now treat weddings, discos (i think the kids call it nightclubs) and a pint out like a workout - I always take a rest day.

My other sister also pointed out to me that my cousin's children ( I can't even be bothered to work out what distant relation they are) and other yoof at the event start treating me with the same pity, disdain and contempt we used to treat our old drunk relatives with. Leaving they waved good bye to Mr madman. Fun times, I rocked the joint so much so that at one point I thought I might upstage the bride, I should never have worn that white dress!!!!

I have also lost the beard, albeit temporarily. I was in a hurry the night before we left to have a quick shave and neglected to put a guard on the razor creating what looked like designer stubble. Now I know the spastics are seemingly welcoming back that best left alone bygone era, but I for one think it's best left firmly in the past. So on the day of the wedding I had to borrow a razor and shave it all off. Now I have always had baby soft and young looking skin, the downside of this loveliness is it's as sensitive as a transvestite's emotions. So it hurt like hell and then to top it all off I had to buy a new razor etc when I got back as I can't grow a beard in a day and need to be clean shaven or have a beard in work. I think I might keep a journal and call it the Beard diary's!

In another post I will air my views on the fools that look like John Donson, the back combed hair, the unisex outfits and the little clones that suddenly think the 80's were cool and fashionable. Muppets! It was a joke and now your it. I got love for you if your born in the 80's, not dress like they did in the 80's! It Looks wank( that's 3)

southside aiyee

Dont stop me now

I thought I would be one of those people who post regularly but it seems that time flies by when you're busy. We are still in the process of moving, just have the final push tomorrow where we have to clean like mofos. I tell ya this time next year we will be millionaires.





Had a good couple of days, the crazy Frenchman was over and we made our way to Portrane and got there a little late. We did manage to get some stuff done before the tide came up too high. Pierre tried the direct start to Xmen which involved some pretty hardcore heel hooking action, I set my sights on Spiderman, the Michael O'Dwyer test piece. The tide had lowered the gravel line quite a lot so it took me a while to sort out the start as it's a pretty minging couple of under cuts up to a slopey polished pinch to a 2 finger hole then a lash for the top. After what can only be described as a multitude of attempts I finally held the pinch and climbed the rest. Pretty pleased with myself as last time I looked at it it seemed impossible. We then saunter off to ground zero where Pierre gave me a lecture, sorry lesson ;), on cleaning the chalk off of holds. Had a couple of plays on some Cooper/Pierre eliminate problems then tottered off home.



I fell asleep on the key board at this point and it has been a week since I have been near the laptop. The move went OK and we are out in Howth now. By the end of the marathon cleaning session on Sunday (Ann started at 7am and I started at a more sedate 8) I was getting pretty stressed, my usual release of exercise having been taken a way from me. Ann got angry, well she told me to go pick up my bike and grow up! So I now have a fairly sweet newish bike. I loaded up the final car load wedged Ann in the driving seat with the chili plant by her feet and decided to cycle in the rain. (Ann here, better known as spell checker! I would just like to point out that Tim did not wedge me into the car like some kind of elephant, I sat in gracefully to a small space!!) I hammered it to Howth, really went for the burn and it was pissing down. I had no jacket as we couldn't remember where I had packed it so I was in shorts and a t-shirt. As I neared Howth I wondered if I would cycle the easy way or over the summit. I went for the summit as cycling to Howth then going the easy way seems a bit like sleeping with a drunk woman - a bit of a hollow victory!



I'll post more when I'm a bit settled

Today I packed

Today, after 17 months in the house, we packed up nearly 90% of are stuff. As much fun as this was, it served to remind me just how much I hate moving, packing or anything associated with moving. It has become apparent though, that after 11 house moves in 10 years I have become really good at it. I started packing at 12, by 4:30 all we had left was kitchen, bathroom and Ann's bench. Not bad for 4 hours work!

I then managed to get all of this in to the back of the little Polo and drove to Howth, I thought I was being clever and left it until half 5 to drive out there. I didn't reckon on the Dublin match kicking out so it took me nearly an hour and a half to get out there. What a nightmare the traffic was and what pricks the drivers turn in to. I was on the North Circular crossing over Drumcondra road with the green light and a guy almost drives into me as he is treating the junction as a 'when you think its clear go area!' Then there is the jamming up of yellow box junctions as if it doesn't matter if you cram up the junction if you don't turn your head and see the cars that now can't go anywhere because you have been impatient and got all of six foot further! I can't wait until I'm back on the bike.

Where was I? Oh yes, moving to Ireland originally it took a rented white transit van to move all the stuff over. Then moving back to my folks 2 years later I was down to 10 big boxes or 2 car loads. 5 Months after that after being seduced by some Irish bird I moved back with 6 boxes, when I returned to my folks to get the rest WE went through them and it was decided some of my taste in goods was lacking and only brought back a further 2 boxes. So today proved that barring clothes, Ann and I have got nearly all our belongings into 1 car load! When all is sorted I think it will be 2 at most.

All of this has meant my best intentions haven't panned out and I didn't go climbing again today and won't get much chance this week . I am hoping to climb at least 3 times a week and be going strong for the start of the bouldering season, I managed only twice last week. I'm out with Pierre tomorrow so hopefully the weather will be good - at the moment its raining so who knows.

We are all off to the yamamori on Wednesday so maybe a session on Tuesday then its all hands to the grindstone until its all packed and dropped off to Howth. It all needs to be done by Sunday for the clean up and hand over, screw it I hate moving!

I'm looking forward to moving to Howth I can get some nice summer runs around the head and some lovely cycles to work. Hopefully after 2 months I should be fitter and climbing more regularly, must get stronger.

On a wedding note I was looking at rings the other day and think I have found one I like although it does make me giggle when Ann asks about my ring size!!!!

Time and Tim wait for no Ann

This title probably means more to me than you guys but I thought it was funny! The thing is, as most of you who have ever received a text or email from me know, my grammar and spelling is terrible. Luckily for me the IPhone in all it's apple glory corrects my spelling as we go, its the punctuation that I lack but I'm hoping to improve.





Anyhow in my new blogger excitedness I wrote up a new post the other night, however my spell checker/proof reader Ann has been too busy to reread it for me. I know, I have said it to her, she is always too busy for me. Whether it is making my sister's wedding ring, making some earrings for a customer in work or working 9 until 8 on a Thursday, I just feel that she isn't making the effort for my new found hobbie! (Ill be damn lucky if this post makes it out). I would like to make it clear that she doesn't censor, just correct. So back to the title, Tim Hasn't waited for Ann and has written another post before she has corrected the first one.





I have today witnessed or tasted the glory of the Burger king Texan whopper! I don't want to over think what it was made of but it was lovely. It wouldn't be something I'd eat everyday as I now feel tired and sluggish but it has been 3 months since I last indulged in fast ish food. It was quite spicy and had Burger king's usual love of onions, I just had to wait 10 minuets to get it.





With the bike still out of action I decided to run home from work again last night. I felt a lot better this time and have been fine today which shows some improvement. When I say fine I mean I can stand and bend my knees where as last week they just kept locking off so my muscles didn't have to work. A little stiff but miles better. As for the time I called in on Ann so I think it took me about the same or maybe less, so an hour 13 for 13.7 km. One thing I thought as I pushed myself up Oxmantown rd was why no matter what distance I run the last 10 minuets feels like hell. As I ran past the 4 courts I was thinking 'I don't think I'll make this running it all', my little devil is saying 'go on, walk a little you have run at least 10 k no one will think any less of you'. 'NO!!' says my competitive side 'you will look a prick walking along in your running gear, keep moving we are nearly home'. 'Exactly' says the devil, 'you have done the hard bit, it will be fine'. So the drama goes on until I realise I'm coming past smithfield and my head has been having an internal debate for nearly 5 minutes.





Then the last bit until I hit Oxmantown rd is a real, just keep moving, nearly there, one more step, UNTIL ,that is, I hit Oxmantown rd. Then suddenly there is a spring in my step, I swear I stop sweating and I suddenly feel the need to greet everyone I pass with a knowing nod or a cheery hiya. I would give hi fives if I could. This isn't just on the bigger runs it's all of them even if I trot around Phoenix park the bit from the zoo until the top of the road kills me, Oxmantown though, and I'm almost breaking the sound barrier by the time I hit the front door. Maybe its harnessing this feeling that makes the top runners great. I'll tell you when I am one.





If the spelling and that goes off in the next bit it's because Ann says she wont check anything about poo!!! I just have 2 things I wish to say today. 1. Does poo inflate when it comes into contact with air? As there is no way my intestines could hold that amount of, for lack of a better word, shit! 2. Yesterday I had a poo of such brilliance that I felt truly relaxed after it almost like I had communed with nature or god. They say the mail g'spot is up the arse maybe it just hit the spot so to speak!!!





This week I went to the co-op twice, back to back, on my days off a little bit sheepishly as the weather was so nice but I thought no one else will be there. Day one this was true. I had a potter, did Pierre's monkey problem which is my 'how am i climbing challenge', then Juan's red problem then had a play on one of Barry's - I got the starting move which really pleased me as I have been missing it for ages ( I wanted to use a bad word instead of missing but trying to use a better class of vocabulary). Then I did some curls press ups and loads of stretching to help my elbows. I left with only a slight twinge and great satisfaction. The next day was also as good, it took me longer to warm up and I was a little stiff but the results were the same so I figure the press ups, curls and stretching could see off the sore elbows. Then Mr Duffy arrived to drop off a Pad and I felt chastened, he never said it but I could see it in his eyes. What is this Muppet doing in side on such a glorious day? Well I'll tell ya, I only likes bouldering and its just no fun getting spat off easy problems as the friction is crap. This is why I thought about the sport climbing trip to give me something to work towards. Anyway 2 days on and know sore elbows, sweet! I'm hoping after nearly a year of this I'm near the end.

Thoughts for the day

This is a post of things that popped into my head during the course of the day. Now don't panic, its not the crazy stuff! I have to warm you into that. So today I wandered from the house up to the co-op and around town to do a few jobs and back again. I presumed this would be a better use of my time than driving to the co-op, driving back then going for a walk around The Phoenix park. It was, I did more walking but I have to say the walking around the park is a lot more pleasant.



Yesterday I drove to and from the co-op then had a lovely walk around the park for 2 hours. When I'm in the park I go top off so to speak, I don't as I walk around town. It's not that I'm shy it's just Ann says only knackers walk around town with their t-shirts off. So yesterday as I crossed over the roundabout by the zoo for my final push home I got beeped at and wolf whistled by 2 young lady's in a car (we will get to that bit in a second).



So without looking, I'm like 'sweet! Who's the man!' Then there is the quick flash of doubt but a quick scan around revealed I was the only person there. It was at this point I clocked the aforementioned young ladies. Now young they were, 18-20 maybe, ladies they clearly were not! Those awful tight tops that reveal that roll of fat around the waist then it tucks in (the top not the fat) to let there saggy fat tits hang out. Pulling just tight enough around the top to reveal back AND shoulder fat hanging out over the sleeves. They also had the stupid fringe things that puff up.



Its amazing how quickly your brain can work, I got all that in under 3 seconds. Imagine the character assassination I could give with proper research. Anyway, this stole the thunder of the original whistle beep etc. It also lead me to think women don't object to being treated like meat and whistled at, it comes down to who's doing the whistling - traditionally over weight hairy arsed builders!!!!!! Now if it was by someone as faultless and handsome as myself they would be overwhelmed.







I was chatting via the medium of comments and emails with Pierre last night and he mentioned that there where more people looking at blogs in these current recessionary times as there were more unemployed folk. He then found stats that said



Technorati is now tracking over 70 million weblogs, and we're seeing about 120,000 new weblogs being created worldwide each day. That's about 1.4 blogs created every second of every day.



source:http://www.sifry.com/alerts/archives/000493.htmlNight now



That is a massive amount of people with a lot of time on their hands. Could we or should we use are time more productively? Just think of the massive amounts of energy used to power 120,000 laptops blogging. How much does that equate to if you include all the updates? Staggering! I'd love to say I have something more interesting to do and save the planet but truth is I would be watching telly if I wasn't doing this. Baby steps, at least this works my brain!







I also feel compelled to mention 2 books, one I have just finished reading and one that is due out soon.



The first, Born to run, by Chris McDougall http://www.randomhouse.com/catalog/display.pperl/9780307266309.html

This was one of the best books I have ever read. I would strongly recommend it to a friend and did, I lent it to Dec! Its all about tracking down a tribe in Mexico who run 50 to 100 miles, have very little food but also don't suffer from cancer, obesity or any of the other diseases brought about by affluent living! It also shows how they don't have the Modern day running shoe but also never suffer from knee, ankle or foot problems. It was fascinating and compelled me to go out running. Well actually run home from work! I have since thought about this and it had been a month since I had run so it took my legs nearly a week to recover.



It has made me consider an ultra marathon! I was thinking of a triathlon but i just cant be arsed to swim. It holds very little appeal to me when the weather is nice. Don't get me wrong I enjoy the odd relaxing swim, but training for it, I don't think so. So why not an ultra? I worked with a geezer who did the north face chamonix ultra and he said you don't try an ultra as you will inevitably fail. You run to finish as its not fitness that sets people apart on a 150 km run, its pure determination. Or as my father would call it bloody mindedness. For the distance I am scared but as a mental challenge I love the idea. Time will tell.





The second book i heard about on the radio Global warming and other bollocks by Vincent Marks


http://www.borders.co.uk/book/global-warming-and-other-bollocks-the-truth-about-all-those-science-scare-stories/1185555/


This sounds great, hugely open to debate about his views but it makes a change from reading the standard lines about global warming and fat intake. As you are aware I always like to be a little argumentative so it could make dinner conversations fun. Ill let you know what I think once its released.





Lastly, I'm kinda thinking about a sport climbing trip to Malham cove in July/August time. I know its not the sunny destinations of Spain, France etc but I can get 2 days in without too much hassle. I have also been told that chapel head is lovely and its all within the same kinda area. I don't plan on sending any big numbers but motivation is sorely lacking at the moment with all this horrible sunny weather ruining the good conditions!!!!!

A Picture doesn't always tell a....

This comes from spending an unusual amount of time picking a picture to go at the top of the blog. I couldn't have one that was too great or I'd look gay, or too crap or it would be pointless yet still something that looked OK. So the one I led with was taken by Michael O'Dwyer at the boulder meet (see http://www.theshortspan.com/ for more details).



They say "a picture says a thousand words" I wonder if it could also be "a picture tells a thousand lies". The picture looks very dramatic and quite good, however I didn't stick it (this time). I did eventually do it but alas the problem is well up in the scree and will probably never get done or seen again. There was a lovely static line but Tom the fatty broke a crucial hold!!!!



On another note the hits just keep on coming. Yesterday I was unceremoniously dismounted from my bike when a passenger decided to get out of their car with out checking their wing mirror. They stopped at the lights and just opened the car door right in to my path! So now my bike has a broken front wheel, bent forks and a snapped chain, not bad for 20 seconds thoughtlessness. I'm grand (I know that's what you were all thinking) just annoyed as I had to got to the Gardai to get hold of the driver who said "are you OK ?" then drove off! Also now I have to get a new bike.



I'm trying, in these pessimistic times to work on an every cloud has a silver lining kinda vibe, so far so good. What was the reason for getting knocked off my bike/ where is the silver lining? I was muesing over whether or not to get a new one? I really wanted one, but couldn't justify it as in my mind there was nothing wrong with the old one however the chain kept slipping and was ruining my pleasant cycles. Now I have my answer!



We will also be moving back to Howth for a month or 2 until we find somewhere new to live, the idea originally was to move southside so how we have ended up moving to the furthest possible place on the northside I don't know! I'm reliably informed Howth still counts as the southside so its all good. Bitch of a cycle to Dun Laoghaire especially without a bike.



I have just read Pierre's blog http://pierreboulderingblog.blogspot.com/ he has felt the need to post a warning to tell people that English is not his first language and it wasn't meant to show case his wares. English is my only and native language, my mastery of the spelling of it and the punctuation is appalling. I'm hoping this blog will help me with that, on occasion Ann will read through and check for spelling and grammatical errors, but some times like now she will be asleep and I get bored so will just wing it.

For my next post I might even learn how to embed a link more neatly but at the moment I just can't be arsed!!

Here endith today's lesson/rant.

First come, first served.

So, Tim online, what a scary thought! The history of the line judge spans back nearly 30 years, I'm sure from the moment I could talk I was offending people. Its not an intentional thing by any means, I don't go out to shock and appall, it just kinda happens.

My first line judge all though she wasn't called that then was my Mother, quite often she could be heard saying 'OOOOHHHHH TTTIIIIIMMM!!! that's disgusting'. Due to the over used nature of this phrase it became TIIIIIMMMMMAAA! My sisters as they grew up also took on some of the responsibility as verbal diarrhea kicked in and maybe the joke about the lesbian and the priest wasn't best kept for bible study!

As I grew older other line judges have come and gone - some keep up the good fight and linger on Peter G, Baz and Michael to name but a few. Skip forward some years and we arrive in Kilkenny where the line judge phrase came into being with me in particular. I worked with a hairy young chap named JJ and while we were out hooning around and something distasteful or inappropriate was about to fall from my drunken lips 'LINE' would be uttered from a dark corner. This was followed by a vodka and red bull and a sweeping movement to distract my brain.

Then to Ann whose own sense of line has been blurred slightly my by incessant ramblings and mutterings. Luckily she has a good group off friends who help her out when we go for meals or hit the town. Often she gets asked how do you put up with him? To which she almost always replies 'white noise, i block him out!' Charming says I, knew no one listened to me, one day I'll have a great idea or a profound thought and you will all miss it!

To this end I thought I would try and put as much here as possible as much as online venting and a break for Ann as much as anything else. Now you all get to Line judge did I or will I go to far? Dermo its over to you........ Did you here about the paedophile in the nursar............